Create Positive Student Relationships

Struggling to engage all students?  Read below for 5 steps to more positive student-teacher relationships:

1.  Greet them at the door.  Start each day on a positive note.  Try to greet students at the door every day to say hello.  Ask about their evening, morning, weekend. Make a personal connection.  Don't underestimate the importance of "face time".
Student who feel valued will enter the classroom with a positive attitude toward school and learning.  If you are late to class, apologize.  Apologizing might sound like you are giving up authority to the class but really you are earning respect with both students and parents. Earned respect will always grow authentic leadership.  

Sticker chart with area for positive note home:

2.  Send positive notes home.  Use as many ways possible to send home positive notes home.  This is especially important when you have students with behavior or academic challenges.  Their parents may be so accustomed to receiving only negative feedback that they perceive home-school relations as broken.  This is a great way for teachers to embrace technology and use social media such as Remind to reach out to parents.  With Remind messages can be sent to the entire class or to individual parents.  Set up "office hours" within Remind and communicate them to parents so they know when you are available to respond to their messages.  This is a great way to be reachable to parents who are unable to be on campus before/after school while still 
protecting your personal contact information.



3.  Give meaningful feedback.  Common core curriculum lends itself to many varied written assignments.  These assignments may range from short paragraph answers to literary essays and research papers.  Google drive is a wonderful way for students to organize their work and gain 21st century skills.  Google drive is also a forum to give meaningful, personalized feedback.  Always start your feedback with letting students know what you enjoyed about their work.  Then choose 1-2 goals for them to focus on to improve their work. Be careful to keep their goals small, focused, and attainable.  Yes, there may be many errors, yes they may be far from proficient but focusing on small goals helps a student grow their ability to successfully reach goals and improve their work.

An example of feedback given via Google Drive:

4.  Facilitate private discussions about behavior.  Some student behaviors can be frustrating, try to refrain from being caught up in the moment.  This may sometimes be very difficult but remember some students use their behavior to seek attention and affirmation from their peers or even the teacher.  Instead, lower your voice or drop a note on their desk indicating you would like a private discussion.  Most importantly don't forget to have your discussion, even if you need to schedule time for it during independent work time or the next day.  Start your discussion by telling the student that you'd like to find a solution without involving parents.   Ask and acknowledge their ideas for how to change the behavior then find a solution together.   Most students will work with you and for those few students that remain challenging you can share what was already tried at a parent meeting.

5.  Find the good in everyone.  This may sound easy but it can be difficult when you have a particularly challenging student.  Take time to observe the student in a variety of situations (in class, with peers, during recess/breaks, etc).  This need not take a lot of time and chances are if you're doing steps 1-4 you already have some insight.  When greeting the student at the door ask what they plan on doing over the weekend.  In one of your positive notes home ask the student what they would like their parents to read about themselves.  While reading and grading work, look for insights into their likes/dislikes.  During private discussions ask about what they do during down time.  If you're unsuccessful don't give up and keep trying.  The key idea here is to take the personal connection to a deeper level.   That personal connection may be the key ingredient to helping the student.

Plant a Seed of Belief...

It's difficult to tend to the needs of our classrooms when our focus is on standardized test scores. Additionally, many educators misunderstand intervention and use intervention programs as primary curriculum.   The fact is intervention needs to be part of the program along with grade level curriculum.  This chase to close the educational gap may keep students gaps from widening but often do not close the gap and result in keeping children from reaching their potential.  Plant a seed of belief while you use both intervention programs and grade level curriculum.  Tending to a child's self esteem and building confidence is the greatest ingredient into closing the achievement gap which can be seen in the following story:

This was my first year teaching 4th grade and after teaching 1st for the past nine years.  I knew many of the students that were in my classroom.  They were familiar faces from a prior year's 1st grade class, ELD class, yard duty, or a combination of any of these.  Many of the students who were struggling as first graders were still struggling and made very little progress over the prior two years of formal education.  Our school spends much of its time and resources training teachers in a variety of intervention programs then uses the programs as primary curriculum which give the students to have very little, if any exposure to grade level curriculum.  This was definitely the case with "E".

"E" was far behind in academics, especially reading.  He arrived in my classroom reading at a beginning of the year 1st grade level.  He was shocked to hear me say that much of his independent reading time would not be spent on centers or teacher directed activities.  Instead we were spending it reading with a 40 book challenge including specific genres to be reading.  Our first interview, he admitted that he didn't read well and was worried about his ability to read.  I assured him that although I spent much time and resources on accumulating a 4th grade classroom library I still had the books from my 1st grade classroom library and I knew he would find something that interested him and he did.  Starting first with picture books and easy readers.  Then with gentle encouragement he started to read longer books.

He did qualify for intervention and we worked together every day in small group.  During our small group time we used an intervention program, Fountas & Pinnell's LLI system.  During whole group we started the year with a whole-class book club using "Stone Fox" by John Reynolds.  As the months went by he continued to read books of his choice independently, kept up to the best of his abilities with "Stone Fox" and continued meeting with me in small group and individual conferences.   He really enjoyed "Stone Fox" because it was about animals so I encouraged him to try more realistic fiction books about animals independently.

The class  moved from a whole-class book clubs to independent book clubs using The Boxcar Children series.  This series is written at a higher level than "E" was reading but he was so excited to read the books that he kept up.  Because The Boxcar Children books are all written about the same level, I offered more varied levels with our science fiction series.  Because "E" was part of my LLI intervention group I gave those students absolute free choice on the science fiction books.  "E" was so excited he looked at every book jacket of the 5 different title choices and settled upon "Eager" by Helen Fox.  Now "Eager" is a book written at 4th grade level and I knew it would be a stretch for him so during our individual conference I asked him to convince me on how it was the right choice.  I'll never forget what happened next because he so eloquently stated his three reasons why when he said, "I want to read this book because it's about robots and I like robots, I know the book is a push for me but I'm ready to push myself, and most of all because  I want to improve my reading."  I was sold!  He did a beautiful job keeping up with the reading and being prepared for the club "meetings".

I'd love to say that his standardized testing score brought him to grade level but I'm a realist and I know that statistically that is very difficult. He did grow 1.5 grade levels in his reading ability and was so proud of himself at the end of the year.  He began to purchase books from Scholastic book orders and book fairs.  During our end of the year conference I showed him his testing scores and told him that the real win was that he found out he LOVED reading and had accumulated many books to read over summer vacation.  On the last day of school this boy who entered the classroom feeling insecure and unable to read left confident and was looking forward to seeing me after his first day of 5th grade and that is the harvest that comes from planting a seed of belief. 

Quiet Inspiration

Behind every successful person there's a champion behind the scenes encouraging that person to be the best that they can be.  Some of those champions are parents and teachers.  Or they can often be coaches, youth ministers, scout leaders, or other adult leaders.  Sometimes they are your parents friends whom you just saw every once in awhile and their seeds of wisdom encouraged you take that first step to becoming who you were meant to be.  Those people are often not even aware of their importance which was the case with one such friend's mother.

Now it's not that I didn't have great teachers or wasn't encouraged lovingly by my parents or didn't have extracurricular activities because I had all these adults who encouraged me and helped me become who I am today.  I had teachers that taught me to love learning and become a life-long learner.  I had parents who sacrificed so that I could become the first person in my family to graduate from college.  I had coaches who taught me the many benefits of being a good team member and the skill of winning and losing gracefully.  And I had scout leaders who brought me on many outings and taught me the beauty of outdoors and fostered the joy of being a nature lover.  It's just that this one friend's mother who I rarely saw because she was working full-time as well as studying part-time to obtain her own degree stands out as being the person who quietly taught me confidence.

Her daughter and I participated in the middle school scouting program and would often spend time together at one or the other's houses.  Doing what many middle school girls do--listen to music, dance, talk about boys, do homework, hang out, etc.  It was during the times we were at her house that I would have these intermittent interactions with her mother that would change my life profoundly.  I'll forever be grateful to Mrs. H. for helping me gain confidence.  

With my close friends I was very outgoing and chatty however with others, especially adults, I would become shy, my voice would be lower, and I would look at the ground.  Mrs. H would ask me to look at her when I spoke and noticed right away how uncomfortable I was in talking with and looking at her. Mrs. H listened to me, I mean really listened.  She would often say to me, "You have great ideas, don't be afraid to share them with the world".  

One particular time, I recall her complimenting me on my outfit to which I responded, "Oh this is old..." and she stopped me mid sentence, asked me to look at her and very firmly and kindly said, "Michelle, you sound so apologetic, you don't owe anyone an explanation for a compliment, merely look at them and say 'Thank you'."  That one small conversation helped me gain confidence in myself.  Once I let go of explaining my way through a compliment it became easier and easier to simply say "thank you" and the compliments felt more sincere.  Sincere not because they were said any differently but because I thought differently when I received them.  I felt more confident and shed my "explain it away" self.  

I have no idea if Mrs. H knows how much she affected me.  Somehow I think she would prefer, in her own humble way, to not know her profound affect on my life.  Regardless, I still think of her often and the simple act of listening and encouraging was enough for her.  In addition, I think about how powerfully we affect children.  Teachers have great power.  The power to encourage and inspire.  The power to crush and destroy.  Which power will you choose?  I choose inspiration.  It might lead to confidence building in another child.  Maybe I'll never know, too and I'm okay with that.